Book review: A Beginner’s Guide to Dying
‘Funny and touching’ - Sunday Times - ‘Extraordinary’ - Observer - ‘Full of both wisdom and humour’ - Julia Samuel - ‘Funny, moving, brave’ - Jeremy Bowen - ‘I had the privilege to conduct Simon’s last broadcast interview – knowing his wise words on the page could live on afterwards’ - Emma Barnett
‘Funny and touching’ - Sunday Times - ‘Extraordinary’ - Observer - ‘Full of both wisdom and humour’ - Julia Samuel - ‘Funny, moving, brave’ - Jeremy Bowen - ‘I had the privilege to conduct Simon’s last broadcast interview – knowing his wise words on the page could live on afterwards’ - Emma Barnett
Published in September, A Beginner’s Guide to Dying by Simon Boas, is the book which builds on three letters to his local paper which went viral earlier this year. Kathryn Mannix, author of With the End in Mind and Part of Life contributor terms it:
Photo credit - The Bookseller
“Funny, moving, brave, sensible – and without self-pity ”
So, there are no shortage of things to like about it.
If you don’t know anything about the acclaimed book, or the author Simon Boas, suffice to say; in his mid-40s, Simon was diagnosed with incurable cancer – sadly caught too late, his time was limited, but he was determined to die as he had learned to live – optimistically, thinking the best of people, and prioritising what really mattered to him.
What struck me was that, to borrow an illusion that, although not one Boas uses, is definitely in keeping with his style, the author was someone who, in the words of Henry David Thoreau, “wanted to live deep and suck out all the marrow of life,” he still did it remarkably well and, when you read the words ‘as featured on Radio 4’ about him in relation to his end of life experience, he was a man who managed the same feat with death. However, what comes through really clearly from his writing is that his highest priority in his last months and weeks wasn’t the acclaim of his book, but that of his closest friends and family.
There is a clear lesson for us all in cherishing what really matters while we can. Simon Boas was ‘Bob’ to his friends and after reading I’d definitely like to have been one of them. Beyond the chance to share the end of life journey with a good friend you’ve never had, Bob sets out two main themes.
The first is why we should feel grateful for the life we’ve had, no matter how short. This is a celebration of the cosmic luck it takes for life to exist at all and to have lived at the point of human history where we get the best experience of it that has ever been available.
He also deals out some salient advice for the dying and those that know them. My big take away was to never drop in unannounced and certainly not attempt to look on the bright side if I do share precious time with someone who has this in short supply. There is no need to unpack this anymore because it is a wonderful, and short, book I’d recommend to anyone.
It feels only right to leave the last word to Bob himself, making a point which here at Part Of Life we could not agree with more:
“Running away from death is not only a waste of energy; it sets life in opposition to it. Which it isn’t. Death is a natural part of life, and the more we understand that, the more we can enjoy living.”
Enjoy!
James Byron, Director of Marketing & Fundraising at Dorothy House Hospice Care.
